Love the Darkness

Why do I cry for you
When I know its just me wanting you
It seems my love burns out so fast
I push too hard and go too fast
I live for today but today
Goes my so quickly and I still follow
I put me heart on the line
And the rug gets pulled out every time
Its not as easy as it seems
To rebuild every time you lose your dreams

I stand up every day
And fall down every other
Every third day I get pushed
And when it seems life's at its worst
She puts her hand out and I stand up again
Why do I stand up why can't I stay down
Is it just another pointless failure
Go down the line and see it happens every time
Now its seems I just can't save her
But can I save myself again
One more time off the deep end
Maybe I'll drown and love the darkness
I know the darkness will love me
It always has...

-A.S.-

Its funny... This was written at 6:10pm on October 12,1995 and in ten years I haven't changed what I know or think about it at all...
The difference between the first half and second half is night/day and no matter how many times I read through it or in what context I take it, the last line always haunts me...

She Kills Me

She only says hello to me
When she wants my time
If she's got another call on hold
And it isn't worth her dime
Stays up late to call me up
But sleeps whenever I call
Lifts me up just to bring me down
And says sorry for the fall
But that's all
It's over you see
You know she kills me

Kicks me out of bed at night
And lets the devil take his due
Makes me fall flat on my face
And says "Honey, that's so you"
Cools me down when I'm gettin hot
And then hits me when I'm cool
Making me out to be the queens court jester
Lining up to be her fool
MAN I THOUGHT KINGS RULE?!?
Well how bad could it be
You know she kills me

Chest bared staggerin come on baby
Why don't you give me your best shot
Maybe its cool and pigs can fly
But if they can't it's not
Been playing your game for too long now
To give a damn about the score
So be happy with your battle babe
You're gonna lose the war
It doesn't matter you see
I've got the key
You know she kills me...

-A.S.-


Writing & performing this was always fun and very silly... I always had fun but was RARELY silly on stage so this is unique...